Politicians are now hurrying to try to deceive KCPE candidates that they care about their education and they wish them well by printing out customized success cards with their photos and distributing to schools.
Oh ye who have eyes see, these people have been in hiding since we elected them, but now that they see the elections looming, they want to ‘remind’ us, to once again, vote their unfaithful, untrustable corrupt selves back in.
This is all a scheme!
Girls and boys, sit for those exams and pass with flying colors, as you would have even if these cheats wouldn’t have brought their colorful success cards to you!
What they are doing is just a strategy, straight and clear.
Now, this is just one way people try to deceive us, there are other ways ‘watu hutupima’;
1. When an acquaintance you just met at an event posts a photo of the two of you and captions it ‘with bestie’, hashtag friends for keeps, hashtag my bae, hashtag loyal fam.
Girl/Boy I don’t know you!
Since when did we become loyal fam? The type of lies you are spitting makes you no different from our politicians.
2. When your mom screams at you for using her just-refilled gas cooker to heat your bathing water, so you get mad and sulk, but when dinner’s ready she calls you by sweet names like ‘mum, daddy’ and serves you the biggest chunk of meat with lots of soup.Wait,
Mum we are still not talking! You can’t bribe my moods back with a piece of meat yo! Okay, you can but can’t you see I’m busy trying to stay mad at you?
So no, I won’t play part in your politics.
3. When you apply for a job and at it’s a panel interview (one person couldn’t just do this?).
They proceed to ask why you want to work with the company and you list all these amazing things about the company (that you read on their website or asked friends).
They then insist they’d like to know what you most especially like about them so you decide to be honest and say the fact that they are ready to pay you so much money tops the list.
Then they suddenly look tired. I’m not taking your politics, esteemed panel.
Give me the damn job!
4. When you attend a house party and all the really cool dudes/girls are not really interested in you, and one feigns interest and asks for your number, so you give them.
But they proceed to ignore you for the rest of the evening.
The morning after you get a ‘hey cutie’ text message from his/her number and you text them back and ask, ‘so you were saving the best for the last or?’ and instantly block them.
Hata mimi sipendagi ujinga.
Well, I could go on, but I ‘d like to give you this space to tell me ways in which somebody tried to fool you, or fool the world, and you saw it coming. The joke was on them.
Share your experiences with me in the comment section below!